P.S. - It says "The most beloved" at the end, but that sounds really awkward so I just changed it to "our most beloved"so it flows better. Also, at the "single hard fact" part on page 7, it said "it was reality" afterwards but just "reality" flows much better, and the former sounds kinda unnecessary when just "reality" could have been said. Meh. Lastly, on pages 8-9, I think that's Kai saying "is it the body of..." because there's a "ka" (indicates question) at the end so it makes no sense for Akari to say it. Hmm. This stuff really puzzles me sometimes. Oh yeah, on the title page it says that the 200 samples they collected were stolen even though they never collected that many, or did I miss something? Meh. Actual last thing to add, on the page where Michelle says "first kiss was, you know", she said "first kiss wa yo", and "wa yo" in itself doesn't have any meaning since it's just there to add emphasis to the sentence, which in turn depending can mean "you know". I just wanted to mention this. Umm, meh.
Fixed those awkward lines on pages 12-13 to something more understandable.